In this week’s podcast, I will talk about why this is called The Intelligent Divorce. The mistakes people make in divorce are fairly predictable – and they can be corrected. If you are going through a divorce, or you have an adult child, sibling, or friend going through a divorce – if you see things going wrong, what can you do?

I will introduce you to the idea of the intergenerational boundary. Protecting this boundary is one of the most important things you can do to help children going through divorce. You will hear the example of Janice and Sam, and how preventing just one mistake can make a huge difference for Sam!

I will also talk about the very different roles and experiences of the “leaver” and the “leave-ee” in a divorce.

Parents lose their center, and they get overwhelmed and regressive during divorce. Do you care about winning more than you care about the future of your children? Children require innocence, and it is our responsibility to give them this gift, even during divorce. Divorcing intelligently can make this possible! We can learn how to step up, when it is truly necessary and productive.


  • The intergenerational boundary must be protected
  • Every divorce has a “leaver” and a “leave-ee”
  • During divorce parents regress
  • Children require innocence